Prior to meeting "the wise and gracious" King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia, President Obama told journalists one of the reasons for the trip was "to seek his Majesty's counsel." It is unknown if King Abdullah also sought the counsel of the President, but a partially released transcript of their private meeting provides some clues:
"You seek my counsel, Barack?"
"Yes, as I told reporters, you are a wise and gracious man."
"So true. Let me counsel you first about women. Take a look at this picture of my four wives. Actually, I've had dozens of wives, but I only admit to four at a time, heh, heh, heh."
"Please don't punch my shoulder, Your Majesty. Gosh...all I see are their eyes."
"Yes, under the laws of Hijab, I only allow them to view the world through tiny slits in their head coverings. Arab women are sacred life support systems for vaginas, so they must be protected at all costs."
"I never looked at it that way, Your Majesty, but you are wise and gracious to allow them tiny slits in their head coverings."
"They are sublimely pleased to serve me, and in return I give them nice things to wear in the bedroom. After all, I'm worth over 20 billions dollars."
"Only a very wise man could be so rich, Your Majesty. What did you do to earn such a fortune?"
"I was born to it."
"It is obvious, Your Majesty, that I was right to seek your counsel. But as long as I'm here, is there anything you'd like to ask me -- the President of the United States, the leader of the Western world?
"You came to me, Barack; I did not come to you."