Even to those of us without rich latina experience, Oklahoma Sen. Tom Coburn's question to Sonia Sotomayor seemed perfectly understandable: "Rather than legal thought, give me your opinion of whether or not in this country, I personally, as an individual citizen, have a right to self defense."
"That is sort of an abstract question with no particular meaning to me..." Sotomayor said.
If I had been Sen. Coburn, and realized that Sotomayor could not wrap her mind around the concept of self defense, I would have resorted to questioning even a child could understand:
"Judge, pretend for a moment you are Bugs Bunny, sitting happily one day in your rabbit hole, eating a carrot and watching The Rabbit Channel on TV."
"I'm in my own home, minding my own business, yes?"
"Yes, Judge. And suddenly, here comes that maniac with a double-barrel shotgun -- the infamous Elmer Fudd."
"Along comes Elmer..."
"Yes, and Elmer is positively nuts from doing meth, cocaine and Jim Beam for 24 hours straight. He digs away the dirt covering your home, points his shotgun right at your heart and yells, I'm going to kill you, you wascally wabbit!"
"I'm just eating a carrot and watching The Rabbit Channel, minding my own business?"
"Yes, and right next to you on a table is your .38 caliber Smith and Wesson revolver, which you have a right to own. In your opinion, Judge, can you pick up that revolver and shoot Elmer Fudd before he shoots you?"
"Well, the fact that he calls the rabbit wascally implies a past history between the two, which could suggest mitigating circumstances and possible preemptive..."
"Damnit, Sonia, do you have the right to shoot Elmer or not?"
"Next question, please."
